I'M A LOSER.
Those were the words which came up in my mind upon hearing the disapproval of the superior to my permission to have a birthday celebration. The process was tough. Swift but difficult. Extremely depressing.
February 19, 2009 - my 20th birthday. Fresh and young. Early 20s. No longer a girl, but not yet a woman according to Spears. However, things aren't changed due to that fact. They claimed I'm still immature, no brain and a stupid little girl whom they've always know. There was already a plan. Almost 30 persons were invited, including 12 blockmates from my section, 2 close friends, 12 recent colleagues. Everything was cancelled in just a snap.
She told me I was boastful for having a BIG party. She said I was an inconsiderate child. She said I have no affection for them. She said I was thick-headed. She said I was selfish. She said I was just like somebody else - A different person with no passion for the love for a family.
Those words kept repeating in my mind. Torturing my emotional and mental thinking each time I close my eyes to sleep. It's like a rock music filling my empty room. DAMN. I couldn't sleep, though I tried so hard.
And yes. I'm a LOSER. I realized how pathetic I am for being what I am.
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